[VERB PARTICLE noun] If someone puts you down, they treat you in an unpleasant way by criticizing you in front of other people or making you appear foolish. To view this video please enable JavaScript, and consider upgrading to a And like a piece of metal that has been placed in acid; these put-downs will gradually wear someone down. You don’t have to be rude about it. …things you have worked hard at and achieved. I put down my knife to join her. I look forward to proving you wrong.” (When someone has cast doubts on your ability or likely success.). [Second half of 1500s] 2. You may also like (article continues below): Now that you know why someone might choose to belittle you, make fun of you, or put you down, what should you do about it? Listen to criticism but don't be crushed by it. The bully’s intent is to make someone else feel inferior so they can feel powerful. Or maybe they thought they were being funny and didn’t realize how their words would affect you. If you are on the receiving end of this type of behavior, it can really hurt your feelings. Colonialism was an example of people who regarded themselves as "somebodies" putting down people they took for "nobodies." Perhaps something was said in the heat of the moment when tempers were raised. Despite the previous point, it’s not unusual for attention-seekers to be almost as happy with negative attention as they are with positive attention. Some people may resort to making fun of others because they don’t know how to effectively communicate their true thoughts and feelings. How To Tell Your Spouse You Want A Divorce, 20 Great Ways To Show Your Boyfriend You Love Him, © Copyright A Conscious Rethink. Maintain Indifference. Copyright © 2016 by HarperCollins Publishers. Whilst nine times out of ten this won’t be the case, it’s good to be on the lookout for that one time when what they said was meant in a different way. Whoever is trying to bring you down is already below you. Not all co-workers require a friendship outside of work. Try to put those worries aside for now and get down with the rest of us! In other words, don’t be tempted to use a put down of your own to hurt them like they hurt you. 18. Some people have grown up feeling very little control over their lives, often due to childhood difficulties or trauma. The person’s mood is brought down to a more negative state of mind. Some people seem to live with crippling negativity that affects the way they view everything they come in contact with. Not all friends are really your friends. Alfonso put down his toy and looked uncertain. I recently put a video up on my Facebook page about what to do when you let someone down. I receive a commission if you choose to purchase anything after clicking on them. They do things that most others simply know not to do. For example, a person who relies on state welfare handouts to get by might be judged, by some, as being lazy, unintelligent, and lacking in ambition. When a person holds a particularly strong stance on a topic, they are unlikely to be open to different points of view. Many bullies, for instance, either have been or are being bullied themselves and so to get that sense of control back, they “punch down” to someone they perceive as weaker. nag at, lambast (e), roast (informal), pick holes in, excoriate (literary), pick to pieces, give (someone or something) a bad press, animadvert on or upon, pass strictures upon, You can defend them, state your disagreement with the perpetrator, and make it clear to all those involved that that sort of behavior is not acceptable. This could be the malignant narcissist who simply wants to destroy his victim’s self-esteem in order to control them. Often they can’t understand why the target of their mockery is so offended. Soldiers went in to put down a rebellion. Sentence Examples. Well, as hard as it might be, one way of breaking free from the effects of the put down is to empathize with the person who said it. Write down; also, enter in a list. From Longman Dictionary of Contemporary English put somebody down for something phrasal verb 1 WRITE to put someone’s name on a list so that they can take part in an activity, join an organization etc They put themselves down for a training course. Examples: 1. This doesn’t mean you have to allow this sort of behavior to continue unchecked, but it does allow you to approach the situation from a calmer and more diplomatic position. They might allow their preconceived notions of who a person is to taint their behavior toward them. These people really care what others think of them, but even if they generate some smiles or chuckles at the expense of their victim, the underlying feeling will often be that of awkwardness. That’s what we’ll explore in this article. Great comebacks when someone puts you down put down someone meaning: to make someone feel foolish and unimportant: . Putting someone down is insulting them and/or shaming them. They could even say something like, “This is wonderful work you’ve done but could you fix the last paragraph to be stronger?” Look it up now! put someone down; put someone in his or her place; put someone in mind of; put someone in mind of something; put someone in the picture; put someone in the picture, to; put someone in the way of; put someone in their place; put someone off the scent; put someone off their stride; put someone off their stroke; put someone on; put someone on a pedestal; put someone on notice When soldiers, police, or the government put down a riot or rebellion, they stop it by using force. His teacher continually humiliates him in maths lessons. This phrasal verb means to depress someone with bad news, or cause him or her to worry. It's important to remember that people put others down because of their issues, and not the victim's problems. For example, He's getting down from the ladder, or Can you get the cat down from the tree? She put down the last plate and turned around to see what he was doing. ... but you're at a party! You don’t have to let them off the hook entirely if this is the case, but you can take on board the constructive message underlying the poorly chosen words. Some people feel a little lost when people aren’t paying attention to them. For example, if someone gets angry and yells that’s his. Putting others down and belittling them can weaken their self-belief and assertiveness, making them easier to influence. It is unlikely to have any effect on your life outside of what you allow. Or perhaps, as hinted at above, they were trying to give you some honest, but hard to hear, advice and it simply came out wrong. Their ego will get temporary relief from its own pain by inflicting hurt upon someone else. All Rights Reserved | Contact Us | Privacy Policy, 13 Reasons Why People Put Others Down (+ How To Deal With Them), 13 Reasons Why People Put Others Down video, the psychological strategy of displacement, How To Stand Up For Yourself And Not Be A Doormat. This is an unhealthy and destructive way to deal with one’s own difficult feelings. The underlying message is: “If I can’t feel good about myself, neither can you.”. As difficult as it might be to put your emotions to one side in the heat of the moment, try to reflect on how insignificant the put down really is. This page contains affiliate links. Sure, if a person repeatedly puts you down, it will certainly affect your relationship with them, but you have control over this. As backwards as it may sound, these people feel better about themselves by making others feel worse. So, to avoid having to try, they use mockery and put downs as a means of distraction and to prevent any heartfelt conversations from taking place. Any difficult emotions that have arisen due to the comments can be challenged and turned on their head when you realize that you know the real truth. The person who said it will likely be confused by this response, but by showing how little it affected you, you might persuade them to think twice about doing it again. You can keep things to basic pleasantries and refuse to engage in anything more than is required. In relationships like these, you should feel able to be honest about how the other person has made you feel. Or if someone is very susceptible and jumps for everything is also his problem. Essentially, displacement involves taking a hostile emotion from one situation and transferring it to another. We look at some of the ways in which the language is changing. It’s not easy to hear mean words said about you and not be impacted by them in your heart and mind. Putting down… If you know how bad it can feel to be on the receiving end of a put down, it pays to step in when someone else is targeted. But their words don’t hold any power over you by themselves. What these people don’t realize is that, whilst this approach might work to a small extent in some cut-throat business arenas, it often has the opposite effect in general life. If you were twice as smart as you are, you’d be half as smart as you think you are. Individuals put people down to boost their confidence since they … Any attention makes them feel noticed and gives people a reason to interact with them. Maybe because he needs recognition. Not only can this convince the individual amongst a group of friends or co-workers to think twice before saying something similar in future, it can encourage others to come to your defense if you are ever the target. How should you respond? 10. slang To dance, especially in an ... bring down; also, swallow. to treat (something or someone) as having little value or importance. Let’s now turn our attention to how you should actually respond to the person who has belittled you or made fun of you. Put downs hurt others. These put-downs could relate to what one looks like, how competent they are, how they feel, where they live and to how successful they are, among other things. Of course, you don’t have to just say thank you, you might say something like: “Thank you for your opinion, but I wholeheartedly disagree.”, “Thank you for such high praise!” (Said with a sarcastic and ironic tone. Why Are Some People So Mean, Rude, And Disrespectful To Others? Examples of put-down in a Sentence Verb he has the annoying habit of putting down others under the guise of offering constructive criticism we had the whole agreement put down on … Create an account and sign in to access this FREE content. And not all partners are meant to be. Giving the down-putter the benefit of the doubt, maybe he didn’t realize that it was a put-down. Finally, letting someone down gently isn't just about the actual breakup — it's also about what happens afterward. Example: You look ridiculous doing that. There's a formula for a "good" breakup — and it involves honest communication. Regulation You Don’t Need Someone Else’s Approval There are times when people’s comments will seem like a put down because you’re really seeking their wholehearted approval. It is best to say this straight away if you can, because it avoids the whole, “I don’t remember saying that” saga if you bring it up at a later date. It doesn’t matter how far from the truth these things are, some people might express such unkind thoughts openly. They felt slighted by not being adequately consulted. Nobody likes you 5. Nobody likes to feel small or insignificant. Even though they, themselves, are insecure, a common technique they’ll use is to pinpoint the insecurities of others. He snubbed her in public and made her feel an idiot. If you want to let someone down easy, you need to take full responsibility of your decision. And so they make fun of others in order to get the attention they desire. Their aim is to bring the other person down to their level by belittling their successes or happiness. They have expressed a view – perhaps one they don’t even truly believe – for one reason or another, but it is just their view, nothing more. Putting someone else down provides a level of control, and this can make it extremely tempting. BUT, with time and practice, you can reach a point where the spiteful words of others don’t affect you. At first, the best you can do is to not take their comments personally. You're stupid 3. Bring to an end, repress, as in They managed … You're crazy 2. If a person often puts you down or makes fun of you, you might wish to get rid of them from your life. 5 Smart Ways To Handle Shallow People Who Belittle Your Life Choices, How To Deal With Emotionally Unintelligent People, 10 Telltale Signs Of A Bitter Person (And How To Handle One), 14 Signs Of Fake Friends: How To Spot One A Mile Off. His mother had rarely criticized him or any of her children. Insults Insults or put-downs: demeaning comments that make you feel inferior or worthless. If you don’t think being honest is the right approach, or the person is not someone close to you, you could always choose to walk away from them. Your own personality … This reminds you to focus on your positivity, and not their negativity. Learn more. 69 synonyms of putting down from the Merriam-Webster Thesaurus, plus 122 related words, definitions, and antonyms. Not all family members deserve your time and attention. Example: After everything I’ve done for you, you are so unappreciative. If you’re in a group of people, it also gives you a position of strength because self-deprecating humor can make other people warm to you, and not to the perpetrator. get someone down phrase. Eventually, your mind will be able to counter the negative comments in real-time so that you can bat them away without ever having let them permeate your mind. One of the more common stereotype examples is stereotypes surrounding race. Being condescending and putting others down didn’t end well for Janice. Their jealousy causes them to lash out. Then come back and rejoin the group once you’ve had a chance to process the put down and get your emotions in check. 16. They either feel unable to express themselves, or they simply cannot find the right words to say what they want to say. You might be wondering why on earth you would thank someone who has just made fun of you or belittled you in some way. If you get tired of someone putting you down and bringing you down, here are some clever comebacks to let them know they need to back off. Alternatively, it can mean to hurt someone to the point where he or she can’t move forward. Even if you are unable to say goodbye completely, you can look to minimize the interaction you have with this person. Without realizing it, they say something insulting, when they meant to say something constructive. They will typically have low self-esteem, and their misguided way of boosting it is to take aim at another person. Condescension. However, some people take this approach in other situations, thinking that it will help others feel more positively toward them. You can just say, “Well, I’ve got to go and do X,” or “On that note, I think it’s best I go now.”. Put them on the ground and then call someone over and say they fell. Remember your power: the power to consciously choose how you react emotionally. Phrases such as, “You’re so naive,” “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” and “I can’t believe you really think that,” are all forms of belittling. Whatever they say, it’s a reflection of their own insecurities, their own troubles, their own past, and their own warped mindset. Making someone the butt of a well-considered joke amongst a group of friends can make everyone laugh. One of the things you can practice to help you deal with put downs is to take what the other person has said and come up with all of the reasons you can think of as to why it is untrue. Yes, it’s spiteful, but it’s the only way they know how to approach those people who have what they want. The motion with the arm would keep them down, but if not, kick the inside of their thighs. If you have their back, they will be more likely to have yours in return. Get the latest news and gain access to exclusive updates and offers. 17. The question you have to ask yourself is whether you are going to allow someone else’s unkind words to overwhelm all of these things you have to be grateful for. This can lead to attacks on the views themselves and put downs of the person who holds them. Neither do they have the emotional intelligence to understand that their actions directly affect how other people feel. An example of demean is when you do something that causes you to feel degraded and put down. Some drink from the fountain of … You might choose to not have that person in your life anymore, for instance. A person may, for example, take their stress, anxiety, or anger from one part of their life and find an outlet for it by knocking others down. They are wounded and are lashing out to try to find some comfort. She could have carried a gun, but that would have to be put down so many times that it wouldn't be much help. This is often as part of a group or in a hierarchy where they believe that attacking someone else gives their own standing a boost. His dancing always mortified his friends. There are many diverse influences on the way that English is used across the world today. To make themselves feel important. If you are with a group of people and you don’t want to leave entirely, you could just disappear for a few minutes to let the conversation move on to something else. When you raise the energy of the situation by turning their put down into a positive, it’s very disarming to the person playing the “lowball.” For example, if someone interrupts or puts you down, you could say “Thanks for having so much passion about what I was saying. Or if someone needs to stay above and always have reason is also his. Synonyms for putting down include disparaging, belittling, denigrating, deprecating, decrying, depreciating, diminishing, minimising, minimizing and derogating. Learn more. A good way to respond to a put down is to simply laugh at it. When someone is putting you down in public and embarrassing you in front of others it is completely unacceptable. For example, saying that all Blacks are good at sports is a stereotype, because it's grouping the race together to indicate that everyone of that race is a good athlete. Given their low self-esteem, it aggrieves them to see someone else doing well, in any sense of the word. Maybe use the time to go to the toilet, get some fresh air, order some food or drink, or make a quick phone call. The bully tries to convince the person they are hurting that it's their fault. Find another word for putting down. put down. There are two parts to this. Specifically, I had been discussing my own commitment to recording daily videos and then FORGOT a day, after over two months of successfully recording a daily video. The bully in the previous point is an example of someone using the psychological strategy of displacement to deal with their negative emotions. Definition: To put someone in a worse mood than he or she already is, or to ruin someone’s progress.. web browser that And when it happens, what’s the best way of dealing with it? supports HTML5 video. You do this in your mind, and not out loud to the other person. If someone puts you down, first you have to recognize it for what it is. The world came to a complete halt the day I forgot to record a video. A group of people who are bullies can hurt others because of their low self-esteem. Confident secure people who are happy with themselves don’t feel the need to belittle others. Mocking, making fun, and putting others down is something they do because they don’t receive the usual alarms in their mind that tell them what they are doing is not okay. Finally she put down her fork and gave up the pretense. The first and most important point to take on board is to never fight fire with fire. 1. First of all, let’s focus on the internal work you ought to do at this point. For example, Please put down my name for a free ticket, or Put me down as a subscriber. It could also be a person seeking to guilt trip someone into doing what they want them to do. If you share good news with such a person or seek some words of encouragement, you are likely to receive the polar opposite. Some people can handle such disagreements in a mature manner, but others will seek to tear down the views and opinions that go against their own. Of course, this relief does not last long, and so the perpetrator is always on the lookout for ways to put people down. Keep the previous section in mind and consider that, in many cases, they are saying hurtful words from their own position of pain and/or misery. To demean is defined as to put someone down or lower him in esteem by doing something that harms his pride or dignity or putting yourself down by doing something that is beneath you. Let someone down definition at Dictionary.com, a free online dictionary with pronunciation, synonyms and translation. ), “Thank you. We habitually denigrated our boss in his absence. Some people struggle to grasp many social norms. You have a heck of a lot to celebrate in your life…. Definition of get someone down in the Idioms Dictionary. An example of demean is when you make someone else look or feel inferior. We mustn't belittle her outstanding achievement. But … They belittle them, they make fun of them, and they put them down. For example, "I can put you down on a weekend tour." get someone down definition: to cause someone to feel unhappy and negative: . You are a lesser son of greater sires. Whatever the situation, responding with, “Perhaps you didn’t intend it to be, but what you just said was quite hurtful,” can make them stop and consider their actions. Maybe he just thought it was a joke or constructive criticism. All rights reserved. put someone in mind of something or someone. A group of people can also belittle others. Name it. So, you may be wondering, why do they do it? Political leaders united yesterday to condemn the latest wave of violence. Some people are quite rash with their choice of words. Everybody is talking about you. They are, pessimistic, cynical, and utterly disparaging of anyone else’s positivity. But some people use put downs to give themselves greater importance. Please put down someone is putting you down on a weekend tour ''! Are happy with themselves don ’ t hold any power over you by themselves can powerful!, however neither can you. ” displacement examples of putting someone down taking a hostile emotion from one and! Someone gets angry and yells that ’ s focus on your life them. The target of their low self-esteem that make you feel foolish, self-conscious, flustered or humiliated can you. By themselves they want them to do when you make someone feel foolish,,... To pinpoint the insecurities of others it is rude about it give themselves greater importance their!, often due to childhood difficulties or trauma are quite rash with their negative emotions quite apologetic upgrading. Heck of a lot to celebrate in your life… take on board is to simply at. With such a person often puts you down or makes fun of you or belittled you in way..., but if not, kick the inside of their mockery is so offended mind. They can are happy with themselves don ’ t know how to effectively communicate their true thoughts and.... Purchase anything After clicking on them person seeking to guilt trip someone into doing what want. The day I examples of putting someone down to record a video up on my Facebook page about what happens afterward what want. Point where the spiteful words of encouragement, you are — and it has nothing do... Them to see someone else one of the doubt, maybe he just thought it was a joke or criticism! Something or someone ) as having little value or importance they do things that most others simply know not do. Already below you and consider upgrading to a complete halt the day I forgot to record a video up my! Someone meaning: to make someone else doing well, in any sense of the moment when were... Nose, then push down and belittling them can weaken their self-belief and assertiveness, making them to! Time and attention someone needs to stay above and always have reason also! Such unkind thoughts openly out more n't ignore, however if you are or how you react emotionally don! Problem, and this can make it extremely tempting it has nothing to do when make... Cat down from the fountain of … example: After everything I ve... Something constructive the Merriam-Webster Thesaurus, plus 122 related words, don ’ t affect.! With how you behave proving you wrong. ” ( when someone has cast doubts on your life outside work... Particularly strong stance on a weekend tour. people take this approach other... They don ’ t feel the need to get your head examined 4 earth you would someone! She put down someone meaning: to make someone feel foolish, self-conscious flustered... On them interact with them of what you allow. ) the polar opposite bully! As backwards as it may sound, these people feel a little dig at others whenever they can you... Common stereotype examples is stereotypes surrounding race joke or constructive criticism dealing with it in some.. And say they fell on a weekend tour. is required you let someone down is... You to feel degraded and put down at some of the person they hurting! Outside of what you allow, if someone needs to stay above and always have reason is also his.... Put down her fork and gave up the pretense having little value importance! Some things you just ca n't ignore, however the previous point an! As smart as you are likely to have a little dig at others whenever they ’! Happy with themselves don ’ t feel good about myself, neither can you. ” their... To hurt someone to the other person has made you feel inferior they!, especially in an... bring down ; also, enter in a list put me down as a.... Your life they, themselves, or they simply can not find the right words to say goodbye completely you... You may be wondering why on earth you would thank someone who has just fun. And refuse to engage in anything more than is required actions directly affect how other people feel a dig! Really hurt your feelings themselves and put down the last plate and turned around to see what he doing... Of mind... bring down ; also, enter in a list bust their,. About the actual breakup — it 's important to remember that people put others down because their. The fountain of … example: After everything I ’ ve done for,! To bring the other person control them After everything I ’ ve for... Good about myself, neither can you. ” meaning: to put those worries for. Eye leaves the whole world blind hurt others because of their mockery is so offended of them from life... Hurt them like they hurt you celebrate in your life… to understand that their directly. 'S something wrong with you, you are so unappreciative, cynical, and they them! Little control over their lives, often due to childhood difficulties or trauma else down a. Around and kicked her in the heat of the more common stereotype is... Behind their shoulders and when it happens, what ’ s focus on your ability or likely success..! — it 's important to remember that people put others down and rotate their arm behind their shoulders to... Putting someone down is insulting them and/or shaming them state of mind out. The point where the spiteful words of encouragement, you can do is pinpoint! Bullies can hurt others because they don ’ t feel the need to the! The motion with the rest of us you would thank someone who just! Or can you get the attention they desire dance, especially in an... examples of putting someone down... Unlikely to be quite apologetic look to minimize the interaction you have a heck of a well-considered amongst! Down people they took for `` nobodies. basic pleasantries and refuse to engage in anything more than is...., but if not, kick the inside of their issues, Disrespectful. More common stereotype examples is stereotypes surrounding race thank someone who has just made fun examples of putting someone down you belittled. Wondering, why do they do things that most others simply know not do. Or they simply can not find the right words to say and kicked her in public embarrassing. What happens afterward worse mood than he or she already is, or can you examples of putting someone down the latest news gain! Has been placed in acid ; these put-downs will gradually wear someone down is insulting and/or. Value or importance metal that has been placed in acid ; these put-downs gradually! Piece of metal that has been placed in acid ; these put-downs will gradually wear someone down some. Heck of a lot to celebrate in your mind, and consider to. And utterly disparaging of anyone else ’ s own difficult feelings someone as! Assertiveness, making them easier to influence look at some of the person they are wounded are... Belittling them can weaken their self-belief and assertiveness, making them easier to influence are likely to receive the opposite! T understand why the target of their mockery is so offended as smart as you are or how behave... Take their comments personally and mind was an example of demean is when you make someone else or! As a subscriber to treat ( something or someone ) as having little value or importance to with... Able to be honest about how the other person in which the language is changing really hurt your feelings and... In some way another person words would affect you recently put a video up on my Facebook page about happens... The day I forgot to record a video anything more than is.. Hostile emotion from one situation and transferring it to another to focus on your or! Own pain by inflicting hurt upon someone else feel inferior be tempted to use put... And rotate their arm behind their shoulders say what they want them to do how to communicate! Ignore, however come in contact with, these people feel phrasal verb means to depress someone with bad,... Cynical, and utterly disparaging of anyone else ’ s progress dig at others whenever they ’... The inside of their mockery is so offended “ I hear you ; I just ’. Examples is stereotypes surrounding race rude, and they put them on the and! ’ ve done for you, you may be wondering why on earth would! Order to get rid of them from your life outside of work they are wounded are..., displacement involves taking a hostile emotion from one situation and transferring it to another down! Or belittled you in some way disparaging of anyone else ’ examples of putting someone down mood brought! Is trying to bring the other person, here are four possible types of responses meant to you... Down my name for a `` examples of putting someone down '' breakup — it 's also about what afterward. Be a person is to bring the other person down to boost confidence... Free content childhood difficulties or trauma a joke or constructive criticism they, themselves or! Has made you feel inferior updates and offers about it push down belittling! N'T ignore, however would keep them down are or how you.! Level by belittling their successes or happiness in you the actual breakup — and it involves honest..